Nice guy?

One night a teenage girl brought her new boyfriend home to meet her parents, and they
were appalled by his appearance: leather jacket, motorcycle boots, tattoos and pierced
nose.
Later, the parents pulled their daughter aside and confessed their concern. "Dear," said
the mother diplomatically, "he doesn't seem very nice."
"Oh please, Mom," replied the daughter, "if he wasn't nice, why would he be doing 500
hours of community service?"
Did you hear about the two dyslexic bank robbers?
They walked into a bank and shouted, “Air in the hands mother stickers, this is a fuck
up!”
Two rats are in a sewer. First turns to the second and says, “I hate eating this shit.” His
mate replies, “Don't worry, we're on the piss tonight.”
Some Blonde soldiers have been seen with bags of sand and cement. A military
spokesman has said that they are planning to launch a mortar attack.