Gems from Douglas Adams

“Time, we know, is relative. You can travel light years
through the stars and back, and if you do it at the speed of
light then, when you return, you may have aged mere
seconds while your twin brother or sister will have aged
twenty, thirty, forty or however many years it is, depending
on how far you traveled. This will come to you as a profound
shock, particularly if you didn’t know you had a twin
brother or sister.”
“There is a theory which states that if anyone discovers
exactly what the Universe if for and why it is here, it will
instantly disappear and be replaced by something even
more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory
which states that this has already happened.”
“I don’t believe it. Prove it to me and I still won’t believe it.”
“Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.”
“You live and learn. At any rate, you live.”